Love -- Melissa

What's Love Got to Do With It?
When I was a teenager, I fell in and out of love about every week.  You know what I’m talking about.  Those heart palpitations and consuming thoughts about the one you
“loved”.   I don’t know exactly what those feelings were, but I’m pretty sure they were connected with my desire to have someone find me worthy of their love and attention (see last month’s post).  When I met my husband, a little over 25 years ago, I had all those same feelings.  This is going to surprise you, but I don’t think I even “loved” him when I married him.  He fulfilled my need to have a man find me desirable enough to want to marry me and possibly spend the rest of his life with me.  I really liked him.  I thought he was cute. He had a cool car and spent money on me (can you say credit card debt?).  But, guess what happened on those days that I disagreed with him and wanted him to do things my way.  I didn’t feel much love toward him. We were both pretty selfish individuals 25 years ago.

Then, my husband started to live out a Christ-like love for me.  I didn’t know that that was what it was until I discovered the “Love Chapter” in the Bible  (1Corinthians 13:4-7).   Love is not a feeling; it is an action.  It is not a noun; it is a verb.  “Love is patient, love is kind and is not jealous; love does not brag and is not arrogant, does not act unbecomingly; it does not seek its own, is not provoked, does not take into account a wrong suffered, does not rejoice in unrighteousness, but rejoices with the truth; love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things.”  As I was typing this list of what love is, the Holy Spirit started whispering to me (and no, not out loud, but in my heart/mind) - “Melissa, you are jealous of _____.” “And Melissa, you did take into account a wrong you suffered by _________.” “Oh, and Melissa, don’t forget when you were not patient or kind to _________. (that particular blank could hold anyone of my kids’ names)  So, it’s a learning process.  But, I am so glad that there is a very reliable list of ways to love someone. 

 

I won’t say I’ve always succeeded in showing love to my husband and kids.  I won’t even pretend to do it 60% of the time.  Loving someone else means sacrificing your comfort, desires, even your dreams for theirs.  It is ALWAYS worth it though!  You see, God commands us many times to love others, but He never gives a command to seek our own comfort, fulfill our own desires or chase after our own dreams. 

 

So when your loved one is not so lovable and you don’t “feel” like loving them - -  Love them anyway!  And love them again! And love them even more!